hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
