he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
