Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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