At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
