would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
