Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
