..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
