I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
