Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
