how can u be prego again
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
