i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
His hands were made for my vagina.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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