i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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