i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
