WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
