I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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