So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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