I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
