the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Randomize
