We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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