I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
