We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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