God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
