I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
