Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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