Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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