if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Randomize
