fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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