Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
