just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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