we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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