nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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