at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
