If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Randomize
