I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
