Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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