Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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