It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
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