There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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