I'm gonna have a badass scar
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
