Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Randomize
