Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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