Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
This toilet bowl is my home.
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