Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
