I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
