we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
