Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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