Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
