The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
