i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I wish life had little blips of pornography
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
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