good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
